Friday Five: October 1, 2021 🌈

She's A Rainbow

Good morning beloveds, we made it to the end of yet another week.

The idea of the Friday Five came about because I felt that people could use more joy or relief in their day to day, particularly now. When I say people, I mean the incredible, iconic people reading this newsletter (please give yourself a round of applause), my friends, and everyone around me. I seldom factor myself into the equation — so much of what I do and who I am feels centered around serving other people first and foremost, and that’s a subject I spend plenty of time unpacking in therapy. In conceptualizing this weekly series, I was always thinking of the reader/audience, and it took me until this week to realize that I really need this, too. We deserve it. Every Friday, I typically share five things to bring you joy or relief — this week I’m just sharing one: a song… and a story.

---

I have secret dreams of becoming a Music Supervisor for television and film — this is someone who oversees every aspect of music in a project, whether that’s negotiating deals and getting clearances on the use of specific songs, to working with composers, and so on. Imagining fighting to get Warner Records to clear Seal’s “Kiss from a Rose” for use in a TV show is truly thrilling to me.

If you couldn’t already tell by all the musical references in my writing or in conversation, music is the connective tissue in my brain: it’s how I think, it’s how I relate, and how I retain information. I fantasize about songs that would fit perfectly to the scenes of shows I watch and I curate specific songs + playlists for my walks around New York, my travels, and random moments in life, because they deserve a fitting soundtrack.

This is all to say, I pay very close attention to the use of music in everything I consume. I’ve been deeply moved and inspired by both the use of music (the how; the when) and musical choices (the what; the songs + artists) in Ted Lasso. I have Tony Von Pervieux and Christa Miller, the show’s brilliant Music Supervisors, to thank for that. I was so thrilled to hear Keane’s “Somewhere Only We Know” in a recent episode that I sat on the very edge of my seat and put my fist in the air (and maybe my eyes welled up, who knows).

I’ve been mourning the unexpected loss of a longtime friend this week, and, unexpectedly, the Ted Lasso soundtrack (aka an unofficial Spotify playlist cataloguing these hits) is helping me through my grief, sadness, and confusion. One song in particular has been bringing me some relief: The Rolling Stones’ “She’s A Rainbow,” from Season 2, Episode 5 (“Rainbow”).

I’m not super familiar with the Stones’ music — my parents immigrated to America with ABBA and The Bee Gees in rotation — so they aren’t a band I grew up listening to. I heard “She’s a Rainbow” for the first time ever watching Ted Lasso. The song is woven beautifully and artfully throughout the episode, culminating in one of those glorious rom-com-running-to-find-the-thing-or-person-you-love moments.

The song came to me as I was trying to think of ways to describe this friend. All my brain could visualize was a rainbow. Colors everywhere. Jewel tones in particular (she looked stunning in a jewel tone and she knew it). I have been listening to “She’s A Rainbow” on repeat ever since, sometimes crying, sometimes smiling, always feeling. My mind is racing to find that person I love, and this song is bringing me to her.

She comes in colors everywhere
She combs her hair
She's like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors

In my grief, I keep visiting her Instagram page, scrolling through her photos, remembering everything I can. And in writing this and looking at her page, I only just noticed a photo of her in a rainbow jumpsuit from last month, with a glorious, sublime, fully arched, awe-inspiring — the stuff of legends and leprechaun dreams— rainbow behind her. It is a perfect photo.

She comes in colors everywhere. She's like a rainbow.

I’m making final edits to this draft, and I go back to her page yet again. I look at the most recent photo, one I have looked at over a dozen times in the span of days… and my mouth drops. I was missing it this whole time. There is a rainbow neon light, perfectly placed just above her head.

Colors in the air, oh, everywhere…

I open our messages and scroll through our conversations, reading through our shared excitement for tomato season and laughing about our families. I keep scrolling up, traveling through time, to see myself excitedly reacting to her having Keane’s “Somewhere Only We Know” playing as she makes a meal, and she replies “yes I loveee Keane.”

This could be the end of everything, so why don't we go somewhere only we know?

Thank you, Tony and Christa. I miss you, Mona.

She shoots her colors all around, like a sunset going down,

🌈 Roya