Hi beautiful Consumers,
*exhales deeply* We made it. Happy Friday, and welcome back to the Friday Five, your round-up of five cathartic, joyful things from across the digital universe.
Historical Moment: First up, sharing a piece of history that’s been on my mind this week, which is journalist Al Roker admitting to sharting himself at the White House back in 2013. There is something oddly calming about the way he delivers the story with such poise and confidence. I also have so many questions for him as a result of this dump of information: Why are you talking about this on national news? Why share this with your colleagues at the station you have worked at for most of your career? Twelve years later, have you been more vigilant with what you’re eating?
Song: Next, we have some music but this isn’t my typical ‘song that brings me joy’ spiel. I’m including this oldie - which is nice enough - because it came on in a restaurant I was in recently, and I realized the vocalist sounds a lot like President Obama. Now, I can’t unhear it. It must be the baritone of their voices, but the bit of chorus from 1:32 as well as the one at 2:37 really gets me giggling.
Mums/Mams of TikTok: There will likely be a forthcoming issue of this newsletter where I exclusively share TikToks that bring joy, but for now, I’ll just share this Irish mother’s pure delight after moving a mirror around in her home. She is fabulous, she is fun, and this just resonates. I love moving one thing around in my tiny apartment and making myself feel like I’ve experienced an Extreme Makeover: Home Edition complete with Ty Pennington shouting ‘MOVE. THAT. BUS.’ I would love to know one tiny change you made at home that made you feel this good.
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Next up, some poetry. I treat Mary Oliver like most Iranians treat Hafez, opening his books of poetry to a random page and treating the one you land on like a fortune, or a divination. This one wasn’t in my lap in the typical sense, it popped up in my Instagram feed but it serves the same purpose. I keep ruminating on the line ‘we are each other’s destiny,’ and holding it tight (even if sometimes the concept of a shared destiny with evil people scares me…!).
Joyful Internet Content:
Shout out to consumers Julie and Kassan for sending me this. Also, shout out to Nelly Furtado, who definitely deserves her own Consumed moment at some point – but hearing someone refer to her Fur-tah-doe is like the first time I heard someone say ‘taco’ in a British accent. Scary!!
Now, for some relief, look at these cat cookies! They’re so perfect. I would eat them all with a glass of oat milk.
For some nostalgia, were any of y’all stationary stans growing up? This slideshow made me so wistful for my tiny collection of Japanese toys and stationary growing up. There was a store in Maryland called ‘Lil Thingamajigs’ and my Mom would take me there as a treat every now and then. The place was full of Sanrio, all sorts of fancy pencil cases and novelty erasers, so many lil characters (and thingamajigs) to fall in love with. I miss stores like this!
Last but not least, I want more harmless pranks in post-game interviews. Not that I watch them, but I would if more of them had professional athletes sneaking towels onto an interviewer or fellow player. The reporter looks like a nun in the damn screengrab:
Thinking about Al Roker pooping his pants in the Oval Office,
Roya
The Irish mom 😭
Wow that cat cookie tin! The skill it must take to bake them so the cats fit perfectly.